Miles In Missions

I once heard a comedian say, “I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired.” Well I can certainly relate to that sentiment. Many of you know that I’ve had numerous bouts with malaria since moving to Nigeria, but you may not be aware of just how many times I have been sick with it.   From my count, I’ve had it eighteen times. My malaria is now a legal adult at eighteen.  It can join the army. It has the right to vote. It can even buy a pack of cigarettes if it wants to.

On average, I get malaria every ten weeks. Now, there are a lot of factors when considering these numbers. Things like the hospital in Egbe didn’t keep medical records on me for the entire first year we were in Egbe. There is speculation that the tests were producing false positives or even false negatives.  About five of the eighteen times I self-treated with medicine when I had symptoms of malaria in the middle of the night or when it was impossible to get to a doctor. This doesn’t change the fact that I was sick with something each of those times and the treatment for malaria made me feel better each time.

Added into the mix were bouts with intestinal worms, E. Coli, Salmonella, and a newly diagnosed ulcer.  I can truly say “I am sick and tired of being sick and tired.”

Each of these times that I am sick, I feel a stirring inside me. I’m stirred with feelings of why am I living like this? Can I just “go home” where there is no malaria? Should I be living here? Is this the way that I “suffer for the Lord?” Am I really doing anything useful in missions if some weeks I cannot even get out of bed? Am I being a bad steward of all the sacrificial donations to us if I’m ineffective? Wouldn’t life be so much easier if we were just back at home in the USA? I just want to feel normal again.

We thought that moving from the bush of Egbe to our new home in the city of Jos would help lower the frequency that I get sick, but it hasn’t changed. Now I am at the point of needing answers as to what is really going on. Do I have a low immune system? Is the malaria reoccurring by living in my body somewhere? Am I susceptible to a more dangerous disease? Do I have something else that is undiagnosed going on? Should I live here?

So many questions, but there are no true answers to be found here on Jos.  So, what can be done? Well, together with SIM, we have decided that I need to seek a specialist in Tropical Medicine and infectious diseases to get some real answers. After emailing at least sixty doctors throughout Europe and South Africa, I’ve found a doctor in South Africa that is willing to see me. I’ve made an appointment for July 5th to meet with him and he is ready to run a battery of tests to see what is going on. Please pray for this time. I will go alone and leave my family behind. I am not sure of the length of stay in South Africa, but I am expecting up to one month to allow for diagnostic testing and potential treatment. 

While I’m stirred at heart when I am sick, I am not shaken. I still have faith that God has us right where He wants us and it is His ultimate plan of what our future holds. For now, we are looking forward to what this doctor says about my condition. We are letting the doctor be an instrument in God’s hands for whatever our future might hold.